A Breathtaking Story

A kindergartner wrote this for me this weekend:


I asked, "Can we go to the restaurant today?" Pa said "YES! We can go to eat steam boat." So I said, "YAY!" We went to the restaurant and ate. (Now wait a second. Please shake this journal uncontrollably and hum a tune because here's where the ridiculous stories start. You ain't seen nothing yet!)

After supper, dad went out to paid the money. He lowered his head to see where was the money. But when he raised his head, his face was purple. He was frozen a moment with his face purple. Suddenly pa shouted, "Wait a minute, I THINK I LEFT MY PURSE IN OUR HOUSE!!!!!!!" Pa rushed to his house and got his purse and rushed back to the restaurant. (Stop here a while too. Here's that ridiculous story 2 starts. Start hard-laughing here. This will be funnier than story one. You ain't seen nothin' yet!)

While pa was gone, Ma and I had were cocoa and coffee. I was reading a book about robots. Suddenly I raised my butt and BONGGG!! Out came my ridiculous fart. Then the girl beside our kitchen table looked at me. Ma tried to cover my butt. But then poison gas burst out of my butt. So Ma pulled me and whispered, "I am so shameful. How can you fart in a place where there is so many people?" Suddenly there was pa, holding his purse. He exclaimed, "Let's go!" So we paid the money and got in the car and went home, and now I'm writing these stories.

Now, don't believe me if you can't believe me. This was the truth, and I'm telling you the truth. I was just telling you a fun story, and that was all. Maybe I can tell you some more stories later. Bye!